


Eye Candy

by StarlightOnInk



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Bad Pick-Up Lines, Flirting, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Pick-Up Lines, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-23
Updated: 2017-08-23
Packaged: 2018-12-19 02:14:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11887767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarlightOnInk/pseuds/StarlightOnInk
Summary: America takes advice from the nation of love himself and tries some unorthodox techniques of seducing Russia. RusAme, AmeRus.





	Eye Candy

**Eye Candy**

America was a peculiar man. But his oddities did not mean he was without his own somber moments, or moments when his excitability dispelled into bouts of intuition.

But for all the insight Russia knew America possessed, he was still very odd. And that said a lot, coming from Russia.

“What, right here?” America said in a velvety tone from where he leaned against the wall, pretending to slick his hair back. “Kinky.”

“What?” Russia asked blankly, just trying to get to the watercooler.

“No need to be shy, handsome, it’s whatever you’re up for.”

Russia stared. “America…are you intoxicated?”

He certainly didn’t look it. His face wasn’t flushed, his speech was clear- if bizarre- and his eyes were focused. But the content of his speech made a man wonder.

Filling his cup, Russia continued to regard the strange man. “Well, then you are on some medication that is making you…what is it…loopy.”

“Loopy for you.”

Russia choked on his drink, taking a step back and coughing, the choked sound dissolving into a laugh. The sound traveled down the hall with him as he left America by the watercooler, chortling to himself as he replayed America’s words.

Behind him, unseen, America frowned in disappointment.

The strange antics did not let up throughout the long day of meetings and negotiations and presentations. As soon as the spotlight was not on America, he continued his odd rituals on Russia. Russia, in turn, indulged him, and watched with open amusement that only seemed to fuel Alfred with more of a kind of grim determination.

Finally, when they were dismissed, America huffed out the door and down the hall. Curious, Russia followed.

“Ah, just couldn’t be away from me, huh?” America asked, leaning against a doorframe.

“America, I am not sure what all of this is, but I have always said you need to keep your ego in check.

“It’s not my ego that’s big right now.”

Russia stared at him, lip pulled up. “America,” he said dryly.

“Step into my office. I’ll explain everything.”

Trying to not roll his eyes- and failing- Russia entered. “This is a broom closet.”

“Not just _a_ broom closet,” America corrected as he tried to close the door behind Russia’s sizable frame. “ _The_ broom closet.” He plucked up a single button torn from a shirt. “A button to the tweed jacket England loves to wear, pulled off when France wanted him shirtless.” He pointed to a pile of cushions in the corner, an odd sight indeed. “Italy likes to have a soft surface for him and Germany to lay on.” He pointed elsewhere. “The cable wire that-”

“Alright, you brought me to the intercourse closet,” Russia cut him off. “What of it?”

America seemed uncertain now that his flow had been interrupted, but he roused himself immediately. “Well, I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice. Undressing me with your eyes. Your every gaze just craves this American bod.”

“Well-”

“Shhhhhhhhh.” America pressed the tip of his finger over Russia’s lips. “Don’t talk. Just feel.” He made to push his finger passed Russia’s lips. Russia did not budge, even as he watched in perplexed amusement, shoulders shaking with poorly suppressed mirth. Slightly flustered, America tried a bit harder. Was met with similar results. “Uh…” He cleared his throat, withdrawing his hand. He reached back, attempting to caress Russia’s lower back. Russia’s impressive size made it difficult from this distance, and America stepped awkwardly close, toe-to-toe with the taller man. Russia smiled coolly down at him.

“I think perhaps someone else is craving someone’s…hot bod?” he suggested.

America gave a shaky laugh, trying desperately to resume his suave persona. “No, no, I see just how hot and bothered I make you. It’s in your every look.”

“Are you sure?” Russia asked, eyebrows raised.

America took one look at his expression and grinned. “Whoa, buy me dinner first!” he exclaimed.

“You were just trying to get me to suck on your finger!”

“Hey, that’s as far as I was gonna go in here. You’re the one imagining us in a bed with flower petals scattered everywhere.”

“I certainly was not.”

“Can’t hide anything from me, Russki.” Alfred placed his hands flat against the door on either side of Russia’s head. It wasn’t the most natural position considering the height different, but he was a determined man. “We’ll get the mood started in here then head on over to your hotel room and-”

America leaned forward. Leaned against the door he had not managed to close all the way. Out he and Russia tumbled, falling into the hallway and at the feet of several other countries. Wolf whistles, laughter, the flash of cameras accompanied their graceless fall, and America peered with wide-eyed horror at all the witnesses.

“Well, well, well, it seems my advice worked. Pay up, Arthur,” Francis said silkily, hand outstretched. A fuming England grudgingly rifled through his pockets and surrendered some crisp bills.

“Hmmm? What is this?” Russia gazed inquisitively at the two before noticing America hiding his face in his hands, apparently willing himself out of existence. Smiling, Russia none-too-gently pried America’s hands away. “My hotel, yes?” he asked.

America gaped before nodding mutely, and so he remained as Russia dragged them both from the floor and dusted them off, so he remained as they strode down the hall, a stark contrast to the serene smile Russia wore.

THE END

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a writing prompts on tumblr using the lines “I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice” and “Whoa, buy me dinner first!”


End file.
